ROSE PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU I NEED YOUR WISDOM!!! I feel like I�%u20AC(tm)m at the end of the road and I�%u20AC(tm)m heading for a dead end fast! I don�%u20AC(tm)t want to waste your time with any essays, but please spare me your time I�%u20AC(tm)ll try my hardest to keep it short. All our lives me and my cousin (Jasmine), who very rarely met up, have both been very interested in witchcraft from a young age despite being brought up and now belonging and believing in a Charismatic Christian family and church. I�%u20AC(tm)ve always felt like magic is something I need to do, like a calling on my life and a year ago when my cousin moved in with me from the other side of England we started to talk about it. She moved because of an abusive and drug filled family situation and her life was heading down a serious road of self harm and abuse. About a year ago we tried dabbling in minor stuff but our experiences, over the past year, rather than the spells themselves are the things that make us feel that we are on the right path. I�%u20AC(tm)ve always viewed magic as the conscious manipulation and harmonization of elements and forces and whenever we both consciously did things like get graveyard dirt very surreal things happened like a beautiful doe jumped out from behind a grave and stood there for what seemed forever staring at us. I could have cried it was so surreal and the way the light hit it, thinking about it makes me get goose bumps. The area is very urbanized as well so its presence was very out of place. Eventually she opted out of practising anymore convinced that it wasn�%u20AC(tm)t right for her, but she is still my other half and I feel like we are almost the same person. A few weeks went by and I kept my humble collection of books and herbs stored up and hidden away in fear my family might find it, almost letting life make me forget its existence. Later by chance I found one of my cousin�%u20AC(tm)s books and looked into astrology and its ties to the elements. I�%u20AC(tm)m a 17 year old male Leo (moon and sun sign) and I am a Fire element. Within 24 hours one of my new best friends from college Millie was talking to me about magic and her sudden thoughts about it, completely out of the blue and something in my head said that not only was she an Earth element and a Capricorn but her best male friend was a Scorpio and Water element. It was again very surreal as I�%u20AC(tm)ve never been so sure of anything in my life. Later I told her and I was right, and we were both very scared. Taylor is her friend and he is interested in doing in to. Eventually I found a girl named Sophia (a dear childhood friend of mine) who was a Gemini and Air but something didn�%u20AC(tm)t feel right about her and I told her that the group wasn�%u20AC(tm)t going to meet up anymore, which I felt very guilty about because we still all wanted to. However Sophia and I did, whilst she was about, meet up on one occasion and do a love spell which unfortunately hasn�%u20AC(tm)t worked yet about 2-3 months ago. But it was in a place I scouted for which is on a little bit of a hill next to a road but hidden despite being elevated. It is beautiful, scenic and has a small forest next to it with a crossroads and the sun comes through the trees just perfectly. But as I walked past it the other day I noticed the council had mowed all the grass so I went up onto the area and as I looked around I noticed the one area we�%u20AC(tm)d been sitting in and doing magic on was totally uncut, surrounded by brown, dead, over heated and cut grass this beautiful green patch just sat there and on the way home I cried and I�%u20AC(tm)m not sure why. I�%u20AC(tm)ve been learning to manipulate flames and some days I�%u20AC(tm)m really good at it but others I totally flop. Anyway the summer had come and gone and I re-invited Taylor and Millie to meet up some time, they are both still eager but only with the other one and I think they are defiantly nervous as well as excited. This past 2 weeks my best friend Ria started asking about the stuff in my room like the shoe box that smelt of herbs! And I let her in on what I was doing, desperate and saddened that I had no one to talk to and that my new found interest/life choice contradicted what I already knew and still know to be true in Jesus. She comforted me and (as she is an identical twin) I laughed and said next thing you know you�%u20AC(tm)ll be the Gemini I�%u20AC(tm)m looking for and with a stunned smile she nodded and said I actually think I am. So now Me, Millie, Ria and Taylor have arranged to meet on the 30th of October right next to one of the Sabbats. And I�%u20AC(tm)m not sure what to do. I�%u20AC(tm)m still lost as to what to do about my Christianity and when I think about it to much I become suicidal. I can�%u20AC(tm)t worship or acknowledge the other god�%u20AC(tm)s. Please tell me there is another way! I need your wisdom. I�%u20AC(tm)m going to introduce the group to everything that�%u20AC(tm)s happened to me and what magic is i.e. the foundation and basics. What else can I do practically for us, for me and my sanity and for our humble little group of four? We are a perfect harmony and balance of gender, negative and positive star signs, elements and interest. I don�%u20AC(tm)t believe in coincidence, I believe in magic and there is too much of it for me to deny this path or group. Taylor says that he would feel more motivated if we had a greater purpose and I agree but what could that be. Please pray for me! I want to order your pack but my mum would be suspicious of the money she keeps a close eye on me which I don�%u20AC(tm)t mind because it means she loves me but I need your guidance. Please, I�%u20AC(tm)m desperate Elliott Page 17, England emp765@hotmail.co.uk
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